Post by Jacob Kreiger on Sept 17, 2010 15:59:54 GMT -5
Irresponsibly ruthless words fill this town but
Never more, will a painful voice flow by
[/color]
"Y las consecuencias del sueño..."[/center]
Those days we spent casually are bidding farewell to us
As we lose those irreplaceable days
[/color][/center]------------------------------------
First and Last:
Jacob Kreiger
Known as:
L'homme Rouge - The Red Man
I have lived:
Twenty Years Old - June 16th - Gemini
I am:
Male
My preference?:
Asexual
I work as:
Part time Hikikomori, Full time philosopher
I affiliate with:
Civilian
The rain hides the sun, stealing away its light
I am troubled as I lost what I believed in
[/color][/center]------------------------------------
Hair:
Short and raven black. Mostly a mess, that hangs down in front of his eyes sometimes.
Eyes:
Stone gray. Dead. Like staring into nothing at all.
Height:
Five Feet, Eleven Inches (5'11'')
Weight:
182 lbs.
Clothing Style:
When forced to go out into the world, or when simply seeking a change of pace, his attire is mostly what got him his nickname. Mostly paranoid about eye contact, he took to wearing deep tinted sunglasses at an early age, to cover his eyes from the outside world. They've been in use so long, that the left lens actually has a small crack down the middle of it, from all the times he's clumsily dropped them. Over his upper body, he wears a long-sleeved and plain white button up shirt, with five buttons. Only four of them are ever done up, whether it be the very top or very bottom that isn't is apparently up to how he feels. To cover his legs, he wears faded black jeans, which themselves are held up by a black leather belt around his middle. The buckle of this belt is a small circle of silver. To cover his feet, he wears zori constructed of (surprisingly) straw.
The origin of his second name cannot be found there, however. It originates from the massive trench coat he wears over himself. The tail of it trails down to just under his knees, and the three buttons up it's front are always left undone so that it swirls about his form in a high wind. As one might expect, the entirety of it is dyed a blood red, allowing him to be easily found in a crowd of 'bland people'.
Extra:
His left arm is covered in a web of scars, ranging from minuscule to quite large. It's something of a web-like pattern, but it ends just above the wrist, and right above the elbow. They are all self inflicted.
I won’t forget those days that I spent with everyone precious to me
Never more, will I be alone even in the darkness
[/color][/center]------------------------------------
Positive:
- Calm and collected, he doesn't flare up easily.
- He's a thinker.
- He is straightforward.
- He is more perceptive towards people's feelings than most others.
- He doesn't lie. No, really. He doesn't.
Negative:
- He is distanced from people, and doesn't quite know how to handle them.
- He likes to argue.
- He likes to make people's emotions 'flare'.
- He is stubbornly clinging to beliefs that generate misery.
- He only knows his despair.
- Because he has been (mostly) right about people before, he will stubbornly cling to what he believes is their feelings or thoughts, since he also believes that most people would never face the real self.
Personality:
"Well... This is a fine mess..."
What once was an innocent dreamer has been corrupted by a world of 'reality'.
Jacob is a quiet man, who loves his alone time the most. His preference is to spend the days without any human contact at all, usually reading or perusing the internet. In the times where he is idle, he usually sleeps or stares blankly at something, tossing around thoughts in his head. Despite his solitude seeking ways, he does sometimes wish to interact (or rather, walk among) people.
When out amongst humanity, he is drawn into himself, and tries to avoid being drawn into conversation or interaction of any sort. He doesn't like feeding the idiots their conversation pie, instead preferring to strut around amongst them, making observations or watching what little of nature he can see.
Though he prefers to avoid people, he does not hold them in contempt... Mostly. Those who have proved themselves to be 'Incredible Douche bags' or those who have done wrong to him or others as he sees it are the subject of his hatred, and all others are generally ignored. When he is forced to acknowledge someone, he is not a rude person at all. He is rather kind and courteous, and will listen to what they have to say and try to not be a smart-ass or a prick with his response. His lonely wants can be easily overridden by someone who is nice (and preferably female), but he is also a fickle creature. He will try to distance himself from people who dissatisfy him multiple times, and he is not likely to open his heart at all to those who are not a paragon of positive virtue... And female.
As one might guess from previous statements, Jacob vastly prefers women to men. It is not a sexual desire, but rather, a desire to observe their 'beauty', and be among it. He just wants to talk with them, and learn more about them. It is not to say he hates men, it's just that he doesn't quite like them as much as women. He's also far more lenient with girls, and he gives them more 'second chances' than he feels he ought to. A female is also the only being that could possibly fluster him, as his prior experience with female contact and interaction isn't exactly 'extensive'. He is weak to women, and more likely to bend to their way of seeing things, though he still won't break from his core ideals, or go out of his way to please them.
Now, onto the juicy bits. What does our hero believe in?
Jacob looks at all things and people as transient, and thus, worthless, and he isn't likely to grow attached on a psychological level to them. Things just aren't worth devoting yourself to if they're going to disappear. He can, and most likely will, still make acquaintances and friends, it's just, he won't be entirely devoted to maintaining the relationship. If things go south and the relationship deteriorates, it's just another 'Unavoidable destination', and he won't go out of his way to fix it.
He is firm in his belief that human life has no inherit meaning. The only meaning it has is the one that people give it. But, since people's achievements won't last throughout eternity, and will all eventually crumble, even that purpose itself is meaningless. He believes that most people live their lives lying to themselves to stave off that fear of the inevitable and eternal disappearance. Of course, one might say that his problem could be remedied by immortality, but his paradoxical belief system negates even that: If people were eternal, anything they did could eventually be reversed, and would still have no meaning.
He is also of the belief that people fail to, and in fact, try to never face their true selves. People instead adopt the facades they use to fool others as the 'true' self, while simply ignoring the self that is the actual reality. To him, all the people are afraid of what they might become if they look inside. He thinks that all people are cowards, but also, that if they could face themselves, they might attain some form of 'enlightenment'. If he takes a liking to someone, he could even try to force them to face themselves, his reasoning being that they will be happier if they accept it. This has lead to a few broken relationships in his life, and furthered his belief in humanity's cowardice.
If one were to ask him what he hated the most, his answer would be "The Gods". He believes that it is mankind's duty and destiny to evolve and eventually transcend their foolish mortal selves, but that clinging to stagnant and unchanging 'faith' hinders the person's ability to think logically and adjust. He doesn't openly express his distaste to those with faith, but he will try to break their faith if pushed, or if the time is "Ripe". To him, it is best to abandon your faith in anything, and thus reveal more of the truth to yourself.
Though he generally looks down on others, he actually has the best of intentions. He wants all of humanity to embrace the truth, and then try to forge a world where they can live peacefully and fully alongside of it, instead of a world where they delude themselves with lies, and only serve to further their unhappiness. His tendencies to avoid people, and his inability to communicate effectively, however, ensure that he won't be the one who makes the kind of change he wants come around and, knowing this, he has fallen into an endless despair. He has accepted the fact that his life will have no meaning, and that he will never see the world he wants, so he has simply stopped trying to live in it. As he is now, he simply waits for death to come and find him, while trying to fill that time as best he can with a pursuit for the 'Truth'. He doesn't experience positive emotions easily, and shifts between being filled with misery, and a state of 'calmness', where he says he feels nothing at all.
Timeline:
N/A
History:
Time just marches on, doesn't it?
The boy was born, alone into the world. Simply his parents, and no siblings to speak of. Barely a week after his birth, his American parents shipped off to the Glorious Land Of Japan, and it has been all he's known since. Growing up was no real easy trip. A weak willed coward, picked at and abused by his fellows. For a great deal of life, the kid didn't know what a 'friend' was. At the ripe age of fourteen, he finally did make a friend. A girl, name forgotten to time, who was kinder than the rest.
Of course, things like that don't last for him. Barely a year, and she moved to a new city, and quickly forgot about him. He remembers, painfully, the happy days that he had spent with her. He sought, for a great deal of his life, new friends, new kind people to hang around with. When he found them, it lasted so little time... And the man was alone again shortly thereafter, forgotten for one of any reasons. Repetition is the bane of life, and the repetition of abandonment degrades the very soul. Thus it was, that boy lost faith, lost sight of what he was living for. A hollow man, now, who only sought for what he knew... Even more, the despair of 'Loneliness'.
A graduation day passed, and he didn't seek for job or anything else. 'I quit the world', was how he put it. His parents, kind people that they were, could never understand the kind of pain their son went through. They simply watched, and supported his decision; who were they to interfere with what their son wanted? So it was, that the longest period of solitude began. Spending the days alone, stagnating, thinking thoughts that had no weight... This was his life, this is his life.
And so it continues onward. Even through the feeling that something isn't quite right, the man refuses to act or change. A life frozen in time, and yet continuing onward... This is what he knows, and it is all he sees through black tint: The 'inevitable' end of days spreads it's maw wider...
I will find it, that precious thing that I lost
Never more, because I’m sure your voice will guide me
[/color][/center]------------------------------------
Stats:
Magic-Oriented
Arcana:
The Hermit
Persona: Cassiel
The Angel of solitude and tears, who presides over the deaths of kings. Unique amongst angels, in that he simply watches with little personal interference.
The Angel stands like many others, mostly humanoid in form. Clad in flowing gray robe that cascades over his form. His body is mostly covered by it's mass. His hair and eyes are the same coloration as his robe, with the eyes lacking pupils, and the hair flowing down past his shoulders. From his back sprout frayed and worn wings of gray feather, some feathers dropping off in a small rain on occasion. Wound around these wings are rusted chains, with tear-drop shaped weights that hang down. All in all, his appearance is worn, as if time has decayed him, and he does not 'glow' as angels seem to.
Method of Summoning:
Unawakened
Strengths:
Dark / Light
Weaknesses:
Lightning / Earth
Skills:
• Mudo
• Hama
• Evil Touch
• Dia
Weapon of Choice:
Clawed Gauntlet (Left Hand)
I don’t know when but I really have forgotten
Those important words that I once believed in when I was young
[/color][/center]------------------------------------
Parents/Relatives:
Papa'n - Marx Kreiger - His father. Takes care of him and supports his lifestyle, even though it is stagnant.
Mama'n - Alice Kreiger - His mother. A quiet and loving woman.
Friends:
...
Enemies/Rivals:
Only the Gods.
Romantic Interest:
As if.
Other:
N/A
In the world I can’t wake up from I searched for them
I finally found them, they were deep in my heart all along
[/color][/center]------------------------------------
Characters you play:
N/A
How did you find the site?: Friends.
Author Notes:
Nah.
Face Claims:
Darren Shan
Contact:
You wouldn't talk to me , anyway.
